A Personal Update

 In Pei Blog

Finishing a big project like my book, I’ve felt a bit of the letdown that comes with that.  For authors, there’s definitely the pressure to keep going with spreading the word… and I can imagine how it might feel like it never lets up.  Like others, I feel the temptation to push, compare, do more, and so on.  In these moments, I’m learning a lot and trying to do 3 things that feel pretty counter-intuitive:

  • Rest, be patient, and enjoy the process!  

    A lot of mentors in my life have taught me this.  The journey and lessons we learn about ourselves are as valuable (or more so) than any specific achievement or results.  Instead of being restless or striving for more, I feel incredible gratitude and contentment for the support and people in my life, and the chance to work on something I love.

  • Be myself.  

    I’ve sometimes wondered if there’s a place for someone like me in this world, when my personality and strengths don’t always seem to fit the world of writing, marketing, and so on.  But instead of trying to be someone I’m not (I’ve tried that before), I’m on a journey to figure out how I can stick to who I am and keep doing what I believe in.  Maybe you can help me to figure that out!

  • Continue to let people into my mind and life.

    Recently I’ve put out a lot of projects and ideas into the world, and it does feel vulnerable and risky to have everything there to be potentially analyzed and critiqued.  But instead of withdrawing from this, I’m learning to embrace it and keep sharing!  After all, I don’t presume to have all the answers, but rather I get to be on a journey of growth and seeking truth alongside other people!  I find great value in that… my name in Chinese means “honest scholar,” so this journey is part of who I am.

As I’ve reflected on these three things, it’s really helped me to re-center on the core of why I’ve worked on these projects.  I write to try to serve and provide things of value and meaning for readers.  I write for myself to process the big questions in life.  And I write for my source of life, goodness, and creativity — God.  I find a lot of joy in all three of these motivators.

And on that note, I wanted to share a poem that I wrote in the dedication of my book (this version is only in the Amazon Kindle and paperback versions).

Thank you for reading and for being with me on this personal journey.  I appreciate you.


To the Leader who gave us answers, before we knew what questions to ask:

Since you walked this earth…


Things haven’t changed that much.

The weak are still overlooked and oppressed

Our streets are still filled with the tears of those who grieve

Those who are loudest still get promoted

And it’s about who you know

We still put on our best face

As we fight to earn and prove our worth


Lord, I still long for a world

Where those who mourn are comforted

Where the meek inherit the earth

Where those who hunger and thirst for righteousness are filled

I still long for a world

Where those who are broken, who are persecuted

Where those who make peace, those who are pure in heart

Will see You

And be called Your children.


May Your Kingdom come.


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